To Break A Bat
by apple2011
Summary: In the Joker's sickest game yet, she manages to make Batman submit to her in the worst way possible. In a single night she has the power to break Batman and Bruce Wayne a thousand times over, so why is she holding back? Why is she waiting to utterly break the bat? Batman/Female Joker
1. Tension

Tell me something, will you ever forgive yourself? Last time you had the excuse but this time, this time when your eyes open and the covers are peeled back how many waves of self-loathing will you endure? How many times will you roll the night back and forth in your mind? What comes first, pain? Regret? Dare I say pleasure?

I don't need to stay you know, whether or not the shame will root you to the spot or if it will instead propel you to fight and drag me back to Arkham is irrelevant. I could slip out that door like so many of your conquests and leave you to remember every moment, but I'd rather watch as the realisation sinks in and the chance to see you defeated is one I will not pass up easily. I do not need to see the horror of what we have done sink in, I don't need to but I want to, I want to remind you that in one evening I broke you. In one evening I proved my point, and in that moment I won.

You will fight of course, it might take a day, or a week, perhaps a month but I have doubts it would take you that long my capered darling. I know you all too well and by the time we meet next the thought of our night will drive you forward, and I love it. I love knowing that every punch you throw will be driven by our energy. I revel in the knowledge that every bone you crush will compensate for a haunting moment of weakness, every life you save will be done knowing that it won't make up for the lives you allowed me to take.

What will you seen when you look at me next? Will you see my smile? Will you hear my laugh? Or will you instead me blinded by this face of mine? See it translated into the contractions you brought about through motion alone, hear every chuckle as a moan of satisfaction. I'll see it in you, before my frantic eyes your frown will melt into something I love and you fear.

I don't need you to be awake to know this will happen again, this is not the first nor the last time but it is the first time you were willing. Perhaps you will find that easier to forgive? Using your little assassin's lipstick made every request a command and stripped you of your free will. A rather appropriate choice of words I think, however as I indulge myself in laughter I find myself wondering how you will bare it. The assassin lay dead, a woman you loved and in return she loved the Batman.

Sweetie, you're better off without her. I'm not saying that because I'm jealous or bitter, I'm saying it because I'm right. Her body needed to slump on the floor, silently watching with bloody breath as her _beloved_ obeyed every word and then, safe in the knowledge she had condemned you to this fate; die. Talia wasn't it? Yes I believe so, oh how the poor thing thought she was clever and then, before the sun had even set, the joke was on her and the joker was on you.

Again through cackles of laughter I reflect on it, though I must confess this time I've outdone myself. For years the tension between us was vitriolic hatred, expressed through battle and then, without needing control I flip it. I point you in my direction and watch you fall apart, and in the end I suppose my darling Batsy, that's why I always win. I know you, I know us and I accept you. I know who you are, both of you, and you know who I am. Our dynamic was leading to this, we both knew it. Remember the fairground? Remember the joke? The laughter and then our lips came so close. Oh it cracks me up just thinking about it.

I bet you couldn't see it at first, persuaded yourself that your obsession was a result of who I was. I was the Joker after all, criminal mastermind and our bond was one of animosity. I was your nemesis, you were mine and while you missed it everyone else saw it. The boy, Jason, I can remember him with a whole host of obscenities about what I wanted to do. I remember him so convinced that the reason you wouldn't kill me is because you loved me, he thought he was doing you a favour by trying to kill me. Though now he is past I find myself wondering if he was right. I mean we are both obsessed with the other, our lives revolve around the other and accept the other for all their flaws.

By the time you awake I am sure all of these thoughts will pass through your mind and more. Though the truth will try and elude you, it will fail. You're too smart for your own good Batsy and it will help destroy you.

Think about it, just for a moment. In one night you validated me, in one night you proved I was right all along. You accepted me for all my flaws as I have said over and over again. These hands, the ones which beat your little birdie to death were entwined with your own. These eyes have seen more of you than they did of Barbra Gordon and the smile which has sent hundreds if not thousands into the abyss, has met your lips in an action you will never stop hating yourself for.

So what flaw about you do I accept? Well I doubt you were aware of it before now but I accept and permit your preoccupation with the other one. I could destroy him you know, he is uninteresting, boring and only serves to mask what lurks in the night. I accept you as Batman, and your mask of Bruce Wayne. You will wake up knowing I know, you will send your family to the furthest reaches of the globe and yet I will leave them untouched. For now. One day when Batman consumes you I shall destroy them and then we will have our lives to ourselves. Bruce Wayne will die and you will be complete. On that day however, I fear we will be moments from the end.

No, I'm not naïve enough to think this night or any other like it will dissipate the tension, nor do I think it has averted the inevitable. We are on a suicide course my dearest and I would have it no other way, the only question is how long. How many more times like this will there be? And no I am not referring to the actual act I'm referring to us, our battles. I've done things to you before, rendered you helpless as innocents writhe in pain, made you endure the paralysis of your favourite pet and that's not even taking into account what I did to the father, but that's the joke. A bat and a clown fight, people live, people die, and the world tries to make sense of us. So how long will the joke last? How many times can I break you before you can't pick up the pieces anymore? I dread and dream of that day.

Sleep for now my dearest, it is the last time you will do so without regret and I will be here when you awake. Odds are you will drag me back to the asylum wondering if I will joke about this from the high heavens, and of course I will but not yet. The day I reveal this to the world will ruin your reputation and that is another scheme altogether. Though it will come as will our death and I say ours, because even when that day comes and one of us is left standing, one will be dead and the other will be dead inside. If I die you will commit yourself to your crusade until it destroys you and if you die, I don't know; probably a murderous rampage and, or suicide.

So our ends are already planned out, and it dawns on me that our beginnings may not be too dissimilar. One bad day made you, the day the alley was watered with your parents blood and you know what; if you don't drag me back to Arkham then I will find Mr Chill and place his head on the spiked fences of your manor; a smile carved into his face. Maybe I'll even make it a Valentine's Day gift and I'm grinning just thinking about it, oh what fun we've had and will have. Though I fear we are closer to the end than the beginning now.

Though what is my beginning? I know you must wonder and I confess to being almost entirely apathetic towards it. Multiple choice origins makes them far too entertaining to be worth dwelling on but there is one, one story which crops up from time to time and I remember it slightly differently than the others. I mean I've been a failed comedian, a prostitute, a mistress, a gangster, hell even a baker and that's only a few of them but this one might just be different. Though all of them end up at Ace chemicals, you remember; the night you created me? I wonder if this or that night will be your biggest regret now? I'll have to ask you sometime, though first perhaps it wise to indulge in memory; the story is beautiful tragic and frankly so pathetic it's hilarious so no, I don't think it is the true order of events. Frankly I doubt any of them are, but in this one I start in a rundown apartment.

A woman who may or may not be me sits in a chair, belly full of baby and waiting for her loser of a husband to get home. Her name's Jeannie and the fact the couple are Jack and Jeannie makes me a lot less inclined to believe this version of events, however despite financial problems they love each other. So there she is sat on the chair, brooding over what name to call the baby when the husband comes home, he's the failed comedian in this one, it turns out he ended up messing up the punchline again, he wants to hit it big but he's still unemployed and hates himself for it. Now these two live in a rundown neighbourhood and so the story goes...

 _Jeannie_

" _How did it go honey?" I was asking so eagerly, so expectantly, but maybe I was right this time…it had to of gone well. He didn't look overly happy but there could be a reason for that, I mean he was drenched. Every item of clothing from that pressed blue suit to the spinning bow tie was soaked, his face was streaming white; all of that silly makeup he wore to his shows._

 _Jack for his part walked to the window, his hands reaching for the cheap scotch and that told me all I needed to know. I wanted nothing more than to take those bony hands in mine and tell him everything was going to be okay, instead I just looked sympathetically from the chair._

" _Well, they said they'd call," Oh no, I could tell by that awkward tremor to his voice it hadn't worked out. He had tried so hard, the green wig, the white face and the ironic clown thing was supposed to steal the show. What went wrong? The material was good, and it had even got a few laughs out of me when he tried it; which was saying something considering how little I laughed._

" _Oh," I muttered under my breath as he just sighed, looking out the window helplessly. His long face reflecting a look of despair, I tried to get up and comfort him; like I used to but I didn't make it from the chair._

" _I messed it up again, it was going well; got a couple of laughs and then…I stuttered, started laughing and never got the punchline out." He murmured, he was ashamed, why was he ashamed? I was his wife, the person he was supposed to feel most comfortable around._

" _I'm sorry," he grunted and then I saw it, the man who for the most part had been waiting outside in the rain for ten, twenty, maybe thirty minutes. To ashamed to face the one person he was supposed to trust and very quickly those streaks on his face were unmasked as tears._

" _Don't worry…" I tried to soothe him, I used to be really good at it but that had been years ago. Before he had sworn of his work in Ace, sure it was a good wage but with my work in the labs as well we made a decent wage. Though when I got pregnant, everything seemed to fall apart. Jack wanted to make real money and everyone had always said he was funny, just no one had seen him in a crowd of people he didn't know._

" _Don't worry? How can I not worry! We've got the landlord breathing down our necks! The baby almost due and we have…nothing. Absolutely nothing." He snapped angrily, at least at first but by the time he had finished his voice was little more than a sob. Everything about him resonated with despair and honestly he was almost right. We had nothing, except each other._

" _Come here, Jack." I beckoned using one of my practise motherly look. One that tried to soothe the tears, ease the pain and bring him closer to me. He did and before long I was buried in his shoulder while we both tried to hold back tears._

" _I'm sorry. I'm so sorry Jeannie. You deserve so much better than to be married to this sorry excuse for a man." He burst into tears eventually, the weight of everything pulling him down and I held his head in my hands. Holding this pointed cheeks and wiped away a single trickling tear._

" _I didn't marry a failure Jack, a married a man with a smile to put the world to shame. Where is it Jack? Where's your smile gone?" I asked in a teasing tone eventually, and he despite himself smiled. A flood of warm emotion gave us a healthy glow, something we could enjoy for at least a few moments._

" _Hey and you never know, maybe the guy will call and I'll be married to the funniest man on Broadway this time next year and even if he doesn't; you still make me laugh which is more than enough." That got him to smile, and then we embraced like we used to and before long he was back to his usual self._

" _I'm gonna do it Jeannie, I'll get you and the baby out of here and soon. We'll move to a good neighbourhood, near a good school and we'll make it work. Yeah we're gonna do it, trust me Jeannie." The scotch kicked in eventually and within the hour he was making every promise under the sun. Oh how he would one day buy me all the jewels money could buy, and we would pay our baby through college with money to spare and all of it would happen just as soon as he got of his feet. Of course to him that day was all so close and while I loved seeing him happy, I was a little uneasy._

 _I'd heard that speech, heard him promise the world and yet the day never came. The day he got of his feet was always a lot further away than we thought and some small part of me wondered if it would ever happen. Though I was nothing if not resilient and I had faith in Jack, blind stupid faith which could leave me stuck in this rundown apartment with creaking floors and rotting walls forever, or instead could make us the family we always dreamed of. It was a risk, a risk I had been willing to take since I first said those vows._

Joker

"Batsy darling, are you just going to lie there…personally I wouldn't. We both know what's on those sheets." I cackled, breaking myself away from the indulgence of memory and instead watching him. Watch that man toss and turn under the checkered quilt and awake in a plain apartment. Nothing too special now, barely painted walls, bare floors and an open window. I watched his face fall as he regarded me, saw me puffing a steady stream of smoke out of the window and onto the street; with nothing on.

"Come on sleepyhead, not that you did much sleeping last night." I teased, drawing out every syllable and as it sunk in and it was everything I hoped for. It was like someone had taken a sledgehammer to every element of that handsome face. Those chiselled cheeks seemed to collapse in on themselves, his skin tensing into something rough, and his hair briefly became a shameful ghost hanging over him. That was not saying anything about this sparkling eyes which lost all shine and simply glinted with the full force of what he had done.

"You know I'd heard bats were nocturnal creatures but wow, they're a little more energetic than I predicted." I continued snapping him out of whatever trance guilt alone had lulled him into, his hand flexed towards his mask. Of course then it dawned on him, he didn't have it, nor did he have his suit.

"I'd offer you a smoke but knowing you it would be wasted. Not a fan of harmful toxins? You should checkout my side effects." I mocked though deep inhales, he realised then that it was too late. Not that I saw what he thought I saw, I didn't see Bruce Wayne I saw Batman, the real mask was that skinsuit he wore and by no means the cowl. Perhaps I would skin something one day and prove it to him. Maybe the next Robin? Or maybe the former one? Or that bumbling butler! That was an idea for illustrating the point, a shame it would only happen at the end. Either way the possibilities were endless.

"What did you do?" Oh he used the voice, something which brought a smile to my pale face.

"You! Remember?" I smiled at the man, watching his fists clench and ready himself for a fight.

"You did something to me." He growled, oh he was making this too easy and oh so arrogant, assuming it was all my fault!

"I did a lot of things to you darling, just none of the things you're thinking of." I punctuated that sentence with a knowing wink and watched his façade crumble, it must be difficult to keep it up when confronted with something like this.

"You…the lipstick!" Oh he found a possibility, not a great one mind you but a possibility none the less and I supposed it was better for him. Rather than a woman luring the so called Bruce Wayne to her apartment before revealing herself as the Joker and still being able to seduce him; it was far easier to believe it was all down to some mind control developed by the league of assassins or whatever it was they called themselves.

"You kept it remember darling? From our last encounter and if I might say it was much more fun with you in control of yourself." I smirked knowing every word was as good as a gunshot. Hitting that exposed muscular frame and striking him exactly where it hurt.

"You made more." He moved forward, aggressively, dangerously and yet he knew that it would have no effect on me, well at least not the effect he was hoping for.

"Oh really? I may be a homicidal genius whose IQ matches up quite nicely with my body count but even the Clown Princess of Crime can't replicate something she used for a fleeting evening and then killed the creator." I retorted with the smirk almost nailed onto my face, Batsy for his part didn't know quite how to react and simply stepped back and turned around. A hand steadied himself against the wall and he made a few deep breathing noises.

"Do I need to get a bowl?" I wondered with some concern, him getting vomit everywhere would really ruin the mood I was going for. Of course he didn't answer but nor was he sick, no matter how much he clearly wanted to be. Oh how the body resisted the mind, all I needed to do know was turn that into a decent joke and I would be taunting him all day.

Once his little episode passed I noticed him tense up again, his fists clenched again and with that; the direction of the conversation became more than clear. I knew what he was thinking, he wanted to beat me until he felt better, wanted to exact mountains of pain for every second of pleasure I took from him and perhaps a part of him was still tempted by my naked form.

"You could attack me you know, we're both unarmed and unarmoured and odds are you would win. Of course you would need to explain how Bruce Wayne was able to do what only the Batman could do and why you were found in a crummy apartment with the Joker. Obviously he would need to endure every magazine printing copies about his affair with the Joker and she would encourage it every step of the way." I almost wanted him to, I would have such power over his alter-ego and it would never go away. He would be stripped of all support, any popularity and I would be the only person standing by him.

"Or you could go, try your best to forget and yet always wonder if this might happen." He was on me by the time I finished, his hands around my throat and look of unleashed rage burning behind those eyes.

"Never again," he growled throwing me onto the bed in an action he immediately regretted as my laughter echoed round the room.

"I mean talk about mixed signals Bats! First you spend the night, push me up against the wall and then vow never again before throwing me naked onto the bed! What's next darling? Or are you going to make me guess?" I dropped my voice to a sultry whisper which would only infuriate him further, that and the following hysterics as I laid on my back kicking the air with the force of my laughter.

"Oh come on lighten up, crack a smile; just because you're coming to the soul crushing revelation that our tension can be explosively and enjoyably sexual doesn't mean you shouldn't enjoy it. Ooh we could start rating the experience! Tell me how was my grip? It's just I had a lot of practise with that crowbar and..." He didn't like that, he didn't like that at all judging from how he slammed my giggling form against the wall with an audible thud.

He didn't say anything for a moment, I doubted he had the capacity to do so considering everything. I just hoped enjoyed the skills I honed while reducing Jason Todd's head to something resembling a crushed egg; that would just be perfect! Something that would torment him for the rest of his life, even more than this and that was saying something.

A rather long, drawn out pause followed that and while fitting it was also boring. So as he held me against the wall in a position that would make anyone else blush, I stopped laughing and simply smiled. Before he could even open his little mouth I pressed my lips against it, a motion which lingered for a little longer than perhaps it should and then I hit the floor as he dropped me in disgust.

"Not bad, not bad at all but if you're trying to convince me you didn…" The sentence was interrupted by flying through the air and hitting the floor like a sack of kittens going into the river. Or children depending on which stunning young maniac you happened to be.

"Shut up." He really got growly sometimes, not that it made much difference and there was something quite sweet about the way his frown burrowed into him.

"Well now you mention it; you did a find a way..." Oooh I was on fire today, through smiles and laughter I was kicked in the stomach and punched in the arm. I didn't even bother to fight back, why would I? These jokes were doing a better job than the number I did on little Harley.

"Shut up!" He shouted this time, standing over me looking ready to do something we both knew he wouldn't…not yet at least.

"Keep it down Bats, honestly sweetheart you'd wake the dead...I might have to go next door and check." A fun night surrounded by death, oh this was going to be a long running joke and one that would always bring a smile to my face. I just twisted myself on the floor, looking up at him with the dirtiest smile I could muster.

"Now are you going to bring me in? If so do let me know I might consider getting dressed before your put me in Arkahm, or are we going for the body cast this time? I've heard you like to sleep with a girl then break…" Oh the Bruce Wayne jokes, how many of them would I end up sending? How many would it take to make him snap and oh it was going to be such fun. A pity he didn't see the funny side and instead resolved to hit me again, and quite hard as well.

"Or are you going to keep hitting me before running in off in shame? I mean you're good Batsy darling but not that good. You try explaining how Bruce Wayne was found having an affair with the Joker; it might go a little beyond the typical behaviour for a playboy billionaire even for Gotham." He wasn't going to do it, I could already see it boil up in his eyes. I wondered how he would justify it to himself. Would it put the lives of his loved ones at risk; not any more than they already were though but it was nothing if not a start.

He was gone in a flash, he dressed himself as quickly as possible and left. He shot a glance at me that could have been warning, loathing or even that tiny part of his mind wrestling with lust. Then he left, and I leisurely stretched. Finished the cigar, used it to burn the painted eyes out of the portraits of whoever's apartment I had borrowed and before long I was dressed in my trademark purple suit. Of course even then my work wasn't quite done, I dipped my hand under the pillow and withdrew the knife I had so wanted him to find. A shame he didn't really but he'd get the message either way, I could have killed him while he slept and instead chose not to. I could have left him to his self-pity and chose not to. Perhaps he would even wish I killed him, more likely he did not.

Though as all good things come to end and while our next meeting would not be so intimate it would still occur. Another battle, another scheme, another time for the bat and the clown to fight. I had some ideas, perhaps make him save his most dangerous enemies? That would be fun; might take a bit of convincing and no small about of kidnapping but the competition had to prove somewhat useful after all.

Before departing however I moved to the wooden wardrobe just overlooking the bed, after which I thrust it open and withdrew the meticulously placed camera which had captured the evening for me. I toyed with the idea of sending it to the Cat, but it would be simply more fun for him to explain it to her. Would he ever look at her without seeing me? I certainly hope not.


	2. Control

"Sir you've run that toxicology screen nearly six times now, I don't want to disappoint you but it seems there doesn't seem to be anything wrong with you. No harmful chemicals are showing up whatsoever," Alfred's words brought back a sickening reminder of _her_ words; but it was easy to ignore him. There had to be something, had to be something she did to me.

"Run it again," My hands slammed down on the keyboard, provoking that disapproving look and one I couldn't deal with right now. There had to be something wrong with me, I would never willingly sleep with that _thing._ Last night had to be a mistake, did she drug me again? Had I been drinking? No it was impossible it was ginger beer and nothing else all night; so how had she done it?

"Sir, if you will insist on handling rather expensive equipment with such force maybe you should reveal why it is you need this test?" How could I tell him? I hadn't told anyone, not last time, and not this time. At least time I had no choice in the matter, this time though…just no.

"Something must be wrong with me, there has to be something." With a reluctant sigh Alfred resigned himself to silence while the roughly inserted needle whirred to life. Blood rushing out of my arm and through the tube as the Batcomputer began its analysis. She couldn't have the lipstick, not this time. If she was right about anything it was that she had no way to make any more, Talia had vast resources and ungodly amounts of wealth while she had a handful of toxic chemicals and whatever her sick mind could come up with.

"Negative," Alfred reported long before I had the chance to look, no; it was impossible I could remember everything and it just wasn't me. Nothing like it had ever happened before except…no, no I wouldn't; that was a heat of the moment thing. Something done because there was no other way, done because the realisation of where we were heading sunk in. Done in a second of bitter laughter and desperation.

"Again," I growled, this time there was no word of protest and as another stream of blood escaped me I knew had to find out how she did it. Had she kept some of the lipstick? No, it wasn't her style to use the same joke twice; plus it had all been there when she left it for me the next morning. God I could still remember it, every action, every command, and breaking free the next day to find Talia's lifeless body resting in a chair. A lipstick smile trailing down to the floor and the offending object, I had it analysed, broken down and destroyed.

"Negative, very low alcohol levels, no detectable harmful chemicals and no sign of anything having been flushed out of your bloodstream, there's nothing there Master Bruce. What are you looking for?" He was right, there was nothing there and the sentence was punctuated by me ripping out the needle and throwing it, still dripping, to the floor. I didn't answer him, was she right? Had I done it all of my own free will? No, no I couldn't have done. I couldn't have done that to Jim, Barbara, Jason and all the others she had hurt.

"She knows Alfred, Joker knows everything." I breathed eventually, I had always assumed she never cared, or if she did she kept very quiet about it. When I woke up in Talia's room the cowl was still on, I thought she left it on, assuming it part of the sick game but what if she didn't? Had she known all this time? Or longer?

"Master Bruce?" Of course he couldn't believe it, worse still he wasn't stupid. Little by little he would put it together, realise why I was so insistent on finding out what was wrong with me. I had arrived home in the morning, hours later than my usual evenings permitted, in hastily thrown own clothes and the moment I stepped through the door was followed by my marching down to the Batcave for test after test.

"Did yo…I'll run a deeper scan Master Bruce." He couldn't believe it either, judging by how quickly he leapt on the keyboard and began frantically searching for a hint of anything to tell him why I would have done this. It was vain, little more than a hope I knew to be false the moment she told me otherwise. It would have been another joke entirely if she had that over me, but she didn't and that was the way she wanted it.

She knew me too well, knew me well enough to know I wouldn't have suspected her. Not the woman at the bar, she was unassuming, polite and it a sickening twist of fate made me laugh. She was the opposite of Selina, and there was something that drew me to her; now I know exactly what it was.

" _You know I was expecting Mr Billionaire to be a little more insufferable," She smirked from across me, a playful look engulfing a curious face. "More self-interested and smug but you've been nothing but a gentleman all night."_

" _I'm sorry to disappoint," I chuckled and her response took the form of a knowing and yet somehow familiar smile. Though it was quickly replaced by a quizzical frown and pointed wit._

" _Keep this up Mr Wayne and I may just like being disappointed. Especially if you have any more surprises up your sleeve." There was a certain refinement to her voice, something that was either strained or conjured in an attempt to appear as something I didn't want her to be._

That something in retrospect had been the fact she had been the Joker, with little more than a wig and some face paint she caught me off guard. Well, there was a reason she was my most dangerous and unpredictable opponent, though this was…utterly unexpected.

"Perhaps the substance has already been flushed out of your system, Master Bruce what is the last thing you recall?" Alfred's calm demeanour was quaky and unsure of itself.

"I remember all of it Alfred…every second." He was dumbstruck, both of us knowing the implications of such a confession. Very quickly it was becoming apparent I would have to tell him. Tell him about the last time this happened.

"Is it possible she was using some sort of mind control…"I tuned him out and smiled bitterly at the wording, of course it was possible; so possible it had already happened.

"Not this time Alfred, this time it was all me." I wanted to retch and vomit up every word but instead they flowed out of my mouth as naturally as ever; somehow making it all worse.

"This time?" He was unbelieving, or maybe unwilling was the better phrase. Unwilling to comprehend that something like this could have ever happened before, or instead unwilling to accept I hadn't told him about it.

"This isn't the first time," A vision hit me then, a striking woman with trailing raven black hair staring at me through glossy eyes. A woman wearing a long black dressed which hugged her curves and allowed her the luxury of hiding any number of weapons underneath the silky fabric. Her face was smooth and yet the tone of her tinted skin gave it the appearance of an elegantly constructed mask and from experience what was underneath was by no means pleasant. All it took was for her jawline to crush two white blocks together and a look of rage could overtake her which made every motion, however minute, aggressive and calculated.

Talia, a woman I had loved and lost. Not to the Joker though, no by her rampant desire to finish her father's work and eventually her utter obsession with an heir. It consumed her, drove her and by the time she had settled on a plan, the Joker threw it all up in the air. It had started with her, started with the Joker taking something I loved and twisting it into a pale reflection of what once was.

No that was unfair, not to Talia though to the Joker; she simply ended the tortuous affair we had endured over the years. Punctuated the years of watching the other evolve into our personal contradiction with a full stop. Years before I would have mourned her loss far more, but as love turned into a violent lust we morphed into enemies who just happened to be lovers. Enemies who knew each other a little too personally, but despite my best efforts there was one person who knew me better.

"Three years ago, before she died Talia tried to trick me into giving her an heir. She was so desperate she had developed a lipstick. One laced with cocktail of drugs, each one designed to strip away my free will…but Joker found out." She never told me how she found out, I supposed it didn't really matter but she had led Talia on. Lured me to the exact city Talia happened to be in and created the precise circumstances to allow the plan to spring into action, and then she snatched it away from Talia.

" _Come here," Talia spoke so softly, in a tone she used to use before any of it had happened. A tone I hadn't truly heard since our first night together in Metropolis, a voice that made my heart leap and my mind pause. Her slim, slender form looking expectantly with a gentle smile and familiar hands snaking around my waist. Her eyes glistening, her mouth parting and her dark locks drew me in closer and closer._

" _We can't do this, not this time." I pushed her away but she pulled me back and my resistance melted into non-existence. Her eyes met my own and pierced into them, silent words were spoken a thousand times but there was more important things to do. Talia was a distraction, the real event was outside…with the other woman. I turned away._

" _Please, please, after everything we've been through are you going to go now?" She begged, Talia begged through a hurt symphony and I turned. I had to tell her to stop, otherwise I would risk…well how could I explain the Joker adequately. How could I explain just how many deaths she could cause and how many would be on my conscience before morning?_

" _I have to, not this time, not tonight." The worst coincidence we had ever been subject to, any other night might have been different but not this one. Somehow there was one person who always took precedent, one person who would always come first no matter how much I wished otherwise._

" _Are you going to put that thing first? You go out there and she wins again, she gets to ruin your life and tear you apart from the people you love. How many more people will you sacrifice to get to her?" I spun around and Talia just glared angrily. It was her habit of every now and then slipping up and exposing the cold hearted killer behind that refined elegance._

" _That's not fair, and you know it." I snapped, knowing who she was referring to all too well but of course she only stared back. Eyes brimming with angry tears and a body trembling with fury._

" _What do you think would happen if I didn't go? She would wonder, she would demand to know why. Then what…what if she finds out it was because of you." Joker would kill her on principle, she had made that very clear about the people I loved; they had no place in our world._

" _I'm not afraid of a lunatic dressed as a clown." Talia retorted sweeping forward, that black dress billowing around her like the furious whirlwind she was. I shook my head,_

" _Don't underestimate her, you wouldn't be the first and you won't be the last but underestimating her gets people hurt. It gets you tortured, killed…or worse." She had pushed me too far and she knew it, she couldn't keep away that look of concern and when she spoke again it was as if the proceeding moments had never even occurred._

" _I'm sorry." She murmured glancing towards the floor withal the regret she could muster, I turned to the window; the city needed me and she needed to be stopped._

" _Wait." She begged, grabbing me by the shoulder and pulling me into a crushing kiss which was broken too soon for us both. I looked at her sadly and saw the same expression reflected back at me._

" _Stay." She spoke again quite quickly, in an authoritative tone I had no choice but to ignore and instead prepared for what was going to happen. Preparing for whatever horrific joke she would play tonight._

" _Stay." Firmer this time and maybe a small part of her expected me to listen, but by the third time she said it I was positioned on the window; all I needed to do was leap over the gap, go over the railing and…something moved! I reacted just as something grabbed my throat and threw itself on me hard enough for me to hit the floor. Then, just the sensation of lips being pressed to my own and then they were gone._

In retrospect should have known something was off from the moment I met Talia, we had done nothing but fight for months and our last meeting had left her in dire need of a Lazarus pit. Though she was nothing if not an apt manipulator, she played my strings all too well and calculated every word to remind me of what we were; and of what we lost. The lipstick was a last resort I supposed, something she didn't want to even consider but she was already lost. Obsessed with finding an heir, one she wanted to extract from me; she had become her father without even knowing it and it killed her.

I don't know how Joker knew, I don't know how she managed to conceal herself on the balcony nor how she was able to slip past Talia's guard. All I know is she had a single second and for us that was leisurely. Usually our fights are decided in less but she had the drop on me for once, a situation which ended in a deep kiss which left a warm tingling sensation infecting every part of me.

"Dear God," Alfred had nothing else to say to the story and in all honesty there was very little else that could be said. Explaining and understanding it was nearly impossible. I had kept it to myself because there was no way I could explain just how horrifying it was, how being under the control of your worst enemy is heart wrenching and utterly terrifying. Though having to live with it; now that was worse.

" _Now that my darling, that was a real kiss." I couldn't move, couldn't speak and instead saw a pair of gleaming green eyes staring into my own. Then I saw her pointed face and chalk white skin, everything drawing attention to ruby red lips which quickly twisted into an all too familiar smile. A gun was in her hand before I could blink and while every instinct wanted to snatch it out of her hand, I was frozen. Unable to move and my eyes were just able to find Talia who was watching the event with a twisted transfixion._

" _Don't move," her tone was rougher than her wide grin would suggest but the revolver was already in her hand; the enlarged barrel pointing directly at Talia who was already looking for the right moment to strike. I tried to scream at her not to take it, she was out of depth but she wouldn't accept it; she was too damn stubborn. A few very long seconds passed over us, and then Joker took control once more._

" _You know it really is nice of you to get him ready for me, thank the nice lady would you bats?" Joker beamed and then, despite every lurching feeling my mouth began to open as another gun slipped out of a loose fitting purple sleeve._

" _Thank you Talia," It was slower, more of a monotone drawl than an actual expression of speech but it was effective. How could Joker get something like this? She was good but a mind control lipstick? It was beyond even her immense chemical skill._

" _Now, before we proceed to the main event and please do keep up here because it's going to be a killer, perhaps you miss ghoul or, whatever the hell your name is, explain to my dearest Batsy exactly what is happening to his body." The barrel of gun was pointed at my eye as I lay motionless on the floor, Talia was looking down at me while also looking at Joker with a display of horror designed to mask her calculating mind. The gun clicked._

" _I don't mean to rush you but they don't call him the world's greatest detective for nothing you know and seeing him writhe in your betrayal really would bring a smile to this face." She shook her head, flicking her shoulder length green hair from side to side with her trademark smile remaining static. Talia didn't say anything, but she didn't need to. I was right; Joker couldn't have come up with this on her own but Talia could._

" _Three seconds, and I blow his batty brains out." She wouldn't do it, Joker wouldn't go to all this trouble to kill me before she had the chance to have any fun; but Talia didn't know that._

" _Two." Joker's finger tightened around the trigger, Talia's eyes wobbled and were for a second; left devoid of anything. She had no idea what to do, and yet if she could hold out, just call her bluff…_

" _I did it, I had that lipstick developed Batman. I wanted to use it to control you, to make you...give me what I wanted." Of course she did, I was a fool to think even for a moment she had changed and her rampant desire for an heir had even dimmed. I should have assumed the worst and left long before I gave her the chance to kiss me; though this time someone else got there first._

" _You see was that so hard? Now he can die with the pain of a loved one's betrayal." She pulled the trigger and there was a thundering bang, the stench of acrid smoke and the sight of a flag shooting out from the gun and unrolling to reveal a drawn on bang. Talia had her arms out in shock, shouting no before realising exactly what was going on and Joker descended into high pitched hysterics. Like a dancer she spun on her feet away from me. Talia stared at the Joker, she was going to make a move any second now. The other gun, presumably armed was pointed directly at Talia._

" _Batsy, stand up." She cooed in a voice that made every thought cringe and recoil in horror, though that only made it worse as I sluggishly got up and stood stock still. Joker's eyes never left Talia, I knew the clown wanted Talia to watch this, wanted her to see exactly how much power she had over me._

" _Come, put your arm around me." No, I couldn't, I wouldn't but without will I simply moved over to her and my arm crept around her stomach…looking at Talia helplessly; praying she had a way out of it. A cure perhaps? A way out? A safe word or anything? Talia's eyes clicked she had decided on something but another part of me begged her to stop; she was out of her league._

" _Put your head on my shoulder." Joker's demand was said and before long I was breathing in the faintly chemical scent of her hair, the hand on her stomach feeling the soft intake of air. Talia's hand dipped into her dress, she was going for a weapon but that was insane, Joker had two guns pointed at her; that flag was supposed to look like a prop, that was the joke and it was a lethal one._

" _Hand a little higher." Her comment was vague enough to leave one arm hugging her midsection, I grappled with my mind; she let out something resembling a chuckle. It didn't take long for her next command to come and then from Talia's dress came the glinting of a blade._

" _Higher." It reached the intended destination and I wanted nothing more than to tear it away in disgust. Talia was reaching for a knife, but if I had spotted it then there was no way Joker hadn't._

" _Batsy can you see your girl?" She asked in a mocking tone as she subtly readjusted her aim, waiting for the same moment I was but she didn't know Talia; if Talia was lucky there was a good chance of ending this here and now._

" _Yes." My words were truthful, I could see Talia but that wasn't was Joker was getting at, she meant her and in that second I knew she was intent on murdering Talia. Out of jealously? Spite? Or maybe she saw her as competition, or worse it was being done on principle. I had to resist it, had to force myself to stop doing this, had to break free._

" _Good now I know how you feel about decimating mortality so I'll spare you the pain darling. Kiss my neck until I order you to stop." She was enjoying this, and I was hating it as that sickly chemical air filled my nostrils and I was forced to press my lips to her chalk white neck, buried under green locks and unable to break away._

 _Talia produced a knife, I just able to make it out between blinks and a tiny window of vison; but a knife was in her hand. Talia was fast, very fast but Joker was faster; a bullet went through, and shot the knife out of, her hand. The gun with the flag was raised next, and fired._

 _I couldn't scream, couldn't cry out and instead I just kissed a pale neck as a sickening crack filled the room, following by a thud and gargling. One hand holding the chest of my worst enemy, as Talia fell._

" _I told you a long time ago what happens when you bring your friends into our crazy little game, but you didn't listen did you? But as always it's up to me to show you the way, and right now I'm going to remind you who your number one girl is." Her intention was so clear I wanted to throw up, my body just refused to obey._

" _Stop Bats, look…look at the mess you made." Talia was on the floor, the joke flag was embedded in her chest and she was struggling to sit up. Blood flakes were on her lip and every breath looked like a struggle. I wanted to scream, wanted to shout no and save her but instead I just stared; waiting the next command knowing it was somehow going to be worse, worse than this. She turned around, kept my hand right where it was and moved the other one to the small of her back. Her expression was humourless, and oh so serious._

" _Kiss me." She growled roughly, she forced her lips to mine in a petrifying kiss long before I had the chance to obey. Her tongue slithered into my mouth and mine disobeyed every fibre of my being. Eventually, thankfully, she broke the kiss and the she was smiling. Her tone dropped to whatever she used when acting as if we were a couple during our fights, a tone that made everything surreal. Like a dream I was about to wake up from, just without the looming relief._

" _Now darling, strip of everything but the cowl and I mean everything. Then get on the bed, I'm going to have a few words with our guest." I heard those overjoyed giggles as tormenting echoes as I tore myself away from Talia and, and obeyed her instructions without question. By the time I was done, Joker had sat Talia down in a chair; and positioned her so she was forced to watch the bed through barely blinking eyes. Oh God no._

 _Elegantly, as if she was preforming to a wide audience, Joker turned around and threw off her purple jacket. She walked over to the bed and very slowly, began unbuttoning her pinstriped shirt._

"Joker made me…do an awful lot that night. She made Talia watch and even finished her off on her way out. When she was done with me, hours later, she told me to hold her and sleep. When I woke up she was gone, leaving behind Talia's body with that awful, horrified look on her face and a lipstick smile. The rest of the lipstick she gave to me as a reminder, she brought it up the next time I met her and then less and less; I assumed she was satisfied." I spat the last few words, feeling as if a great weight had been lifted off my chest but that was fleeting. Now Alfred knew, how long before others would? How long before others would find out about last night? The time where she didn't even need the lipstick. How could I explain that to all of the people who counted on me? Those who trusted me?

"Master Bruce…" Whatever Alfred wanted to say the words died on his lips, how could anyone console another after hearing that story? Though now that night three years ago seemed minor, trivial in the face of what I did. My eyes swam around the cave, resting eventually on the memorial; the uniform. Jason. I could practically see his eyes through the costume, I had slept with the woman who tortured him to death. A woman who had the audacity to joke about both events together, a woman who brought about a moment of weakness in which I betrayed everything I ever stood for.


End file.
